20 Dec Newsletter December 20, 2018
Inside this edition: Check Out “Bob’s” Response to an IRS Notice!, Where in the U.S. is Jeffrey Schneider?, “Inventor” Learns That Even Money Scammed Needs to be Reported to the IRS, IRS Question & SFS Answer, For the foodies… Korean Short Ribs
Merry Christmas to All
Best wishes to you and your family this Christmas.
The SFS Team
December 20, 2018
Inside this edition:
- Check Out “Bob’s” Response to an IRS Notice!
- Where in the U.S. is Jeffrey Schneider?
- “Inventor” Learns That Even Money Scammed Needs to be Reported to the IRS
- IRS Question & SFS Answer
- For the foodies… Pomegranate Ginger Paloma
Check Out “Bob’s” Response to an IRS Notice!
I am responding to your letter denying the deduction for two of the three dependents I claimed on my Federal Tax return. Thank you. I have questioned whether or not these are my children for years. They are evil and expensive. It’s only fair that, since they are minors and no longer my responsibility, the government should know something about them and what to expect over the next year. Please do not try to reassign them to me next year and reinstate the deduction. They are yours!
The oldest, Kristen, is now 17. She is brilliant. Ask her! I suggest you put her to work in your office where she can answer people’s questions about their returns. While she has no formal training, it has not seemed to hamper her mastery of any subject you can name. Taxes should be a breeze. Next year she is going to college. I think it’s wonderful that you will now be responsible for that little expense.
While you mull that over, keep in mind that she has a truck. It doesn’t run at the moment, so you have the choice of appropriating some Department of Defense funds to fix the vehicle, or getting up early to drive her to school. Kristen also has a boyfriend.
Oh joy! While she possesses all of the wisdom of the universe, her alleged mother and I have felt it best to occasionally remind her of the virtues of abstinence, or in the face of overwhelming passion, safe sex. This is always uncomfortable, and I am quite relieved you will be handling this in the future. May I suggest that you reinstate Dr. Jocelyn Elders who had a rather good handle on the problem?
Patrick is 14. I’ve had my suspicions about this one. His eyes are a little closer together than those of normal people. He may be a tax examiner himself one day, if he is not incarcerated first. In February, I was awakened at three in the morning by a police officer who was bringing Pat home. He and his friends were TP’ing houses. In the future, would you like him delivered to the local IRS office, or to Ogden, UT?
Kids at 14 will do almost anything on a dare. His hair is purple. Permanent dye, temporary dye, what’s the big deal? Learn to deal with it. You’ll have plenty of time, as he is sitting out a few days of school after instigating a food fight in the cafeteria.
I’ll take care of filing your phone number with the vice-principal. Oh yes, he and all of his friends have raging hormones. This is the house of testosterone, and it will be much more peaceful when he lives in your home. DO NOT leave him or his friends unsupervised with girls, explosives, inflammables, inflatables, vehicles, or telephones. (They find telephones a source of unimaginable amusement. Be sure to lock out the 900 and 976 numbers!)
Heather is an alien. She slid through a time warp and appeared as if by magic one year. I’m sure this one is yours. She is 10 going on 21. She came from a bad trip in the sixties. She wears tie-dyed clothes, beads, sandals, and hair that looks like Tiny Tim’s. Fortunately, you will be raising my taxes to help offset the pinch of her remedial reading courses. “Hooked On Phonics” is expensive, so the schools dropped it.
But, here’s the good news! You can buy it yourself for half the amount of the deduction that you are denying me! It’s quite obvious that we were terrible parents (ask the other two). She cannot speak English. Most people under twenty understand the curious patois she fashioned out of valley girls/boys in the hood/reggae/yuppie/political double speak.
The school sends her to a speech pathologist who has her roll her “r’s.” It added a refreshing Mexican/Irish touch to her voice. She wears hats backwards, baggy pants, and wants one of her ears pierced four more times. There is a fascination with tattoos that worries me, but I am sure that you can handle it. Bring a truck when you come to get her, she sort of “nests” in her room and I think that it would be easier to move the entire thing than find out what it is really made of.
You denied two of the three exemptions, so it is only fair that you get to pick which two you will take. I prefer that you take the youngest two, I will still go bankrupt with Kristen’s college, but then I am free! If you take the two oldest, then I still have time for counseling before Heather becomes a teenager. If you take the two girls, then I won’t feel so bad about putting Patrick in a military academy.
Please let me know of your decision as soon as possible, as I have already increased the withholding on my W-4 to cover the $395 in additional tax and made a down payment on an airplane. Yours truly, Bob (Note: The IRS allowed the deductions and reinstated his refund)
**Originally published in “Chicken Soup for the Parent’s Soul”, a real letter to the IRS written by Bob Mullen**
Where in the U.S. is Jeffrey Schneider?
December 5 – 9 – Los Angeles – practice advancement workshop
December 12 – Keyes – Stuart – presenting to local Realtors – The Truth That Agents & Brokers Need to Know About Taxes
December 12 – Sarasota – EAs, CPAs & other tax professionals – Taxation and the Cannabis Industry
December 14 – 25- Vacation
“Inventor” Learns That Even Money Scammed Needs to be Reported to the IRS
Michael Sang Han, formerly of Palm Beach, FL was sentenced to four years in prison on charges of two counts of tax evasion following his conviction for a multi-million dollar tax evasion scheme.
Han owned and operated Envion, a company in which he claimed held the patent on converting plastics into fuel oil. Starting in 2004, Han convinced two individuals to invest more than $40 million in his company.
Instead, between 2004 and 2011, Han used the money for personal expenditures, which included flying in private jets, expensive meals, adult entertainment and luxury cars such as BMWs, a Range Rover and a Ferrari costing over $440,000. Han purchased a West Palm Beach house for $3 million and paid an additional $2 million on renovations.
Han concealed the investment money from his tax preparers and did not report the income on his tax returns, specifically for the years 2010 and 2011.
In addition to prison time, Han was ordered to pay restitution to the IRS for $4,954,027 and three years of supervised release.
A Bit of Humor…
A businessman on his deathbed called his friend and said, “Bill, I want you to promise me that when I die you will have my remains cremated.”
“And what,” his friend asked, “do you want me to do with your ashes?”
The businessman said, “Just put them in an envelope and mail them to the Internal Revenue Service and write on the envelope, “Now you have everything.”
I’d like to hear from you…
If you have an IRS issue, or just want to refer a friend, relative or client, I’d love to hear from you. I can provide a no-obligation, confidential consultation to help you solve your IRS problems.
Thank you for your kind words
Jeffrey is very knowledgeable in his field, He has always fulfilled his professional obligations. I have and will continue to use and recommend Jeff to anyone requiring an expert in his field.
~Paul Doyle, S. Carolina
Q & A
Answer: You cannot ignore paying these back (federal and /or state) payroll taxes. You can land in prison, and the IRS can also put heavy fines on you.
You must take action immediately. Avoiding this obligation or ignoring it altogether will only make the situation worse.
All tax preparers are not qualified to help you handle this difficult tax matter.
You should consult with an enrolled agent (EA) and certified tax resolution specialist (CTRS) who might be able to help you keep your business open while corresponding with the govenment agency and negotiating with them on your behalf. The tax pro will know what information to give and will avoid implicating you for something for which you may not be responsible. He or she can also advise you on the various tax relief programs that are available to you.
You should avoid talking to them on your own. The agent on the other end of the line could lead you to implicate yourself.
A certified tax resolution specialist (CTRS) is a tax expert who helps clients deal with tax issues and represents them before the Internal Revenue Service (IRS). CTRS is a special designation awarded by the American Society of Tax Problem Solvers (ASTPS).
An enrolled agent (EA) is a federally-authorized tax practitioner who has technical expertise in the field of taxation and who is empowered by the U.S. Department of the Treasury to represent taxpayers before all administrative levels—examination, collection, and appeals—of the Internal Revenue Service.